Meatloaf

My mother made a meatloaf
but I think she made it wrong.
It could be that she cooked it
just a little bit too long.

She pulled it from the oven;
and we all began to choke.
The meatloaf was on fire
and the kitchen filled with smoke.

The smoke detectors squealed
at all the flaming meatloaf haze.
My father used his drink
to try extinguishing the blaze.

Mom shrieked and dropped the meatloaf;
it exploded with a boom,
and splattered blackened globs on
every surface in the room.

The dog passed out. The kitten hid.
My brother screamed and fled.
The baby ate a piece of meatloaf
sticking to her head.

My father started yelling
and my sister went berserk.
But I kept cool and said, "at least
our smoke detectors work." 

by Linda Knaus and Kenn Nesbitt

Snake Mistake

One morning in my bedroom
I was startled by a snake,
so I picked him up and took him out
and threw him in the lake.

He returned a minute later,
meaning, no, he didn't drown,
so I put him on my bicycle
and rode him out of town.

It was hardly half an hour
till he turned up in my room,
so I packed him in a parcel
and I shipped him to Khartoum.

When I found him back again
on the succeeding afternoon
I went looking for a way that
I could blast him to the moon.

When I couldn't find a rocket
it was then I knew that, dang,
a snake is yours forever
once he eats your boomerang.

Kenn Nesbitt